Lessons from a Year Abroad
Over the past year, I completed my Masters in Math at Oxford, traveling through the world along the way. It was an incredibly rewarding experience that led to a lot of personal growth, and I wanted to capture some of the biggest lessons I took away.
Why did I do a Masters at Oxford?
When I was doing my undergrad at UVA, I knew I’d be graduating a year early. The plan had always been to stay for an extra year for my Masters. I cared about doing a Masters because I wanted the traditional four year college experience.
In my final year at UVA, a professor gave a lecture about how he left his undergrad to study in South Africa for a year and how it was the best decision he made in his life – getting out of his comfort zone and turning off autopilot. This talk really struck a chord with me and made me look into programs outside of UVA.
I settled on doing my Masters of Math in Oxford for a couple of reasons:
- It would be a completely different experience in a new country.
- It was in math, something I always enjoyed academically, but wanted to strengthen. I realistically would never get the chance to do math in an academic setting in the near future, so spending a year purely on it excited me.
- I would get to travel a lot.
- It was only a one year program, so it fit into my timeline for starting fulltime work at the same time as my friends.
Lessons I’ve Learned
Getting Out of My Comfort Zone
When I got off the plane in the UK for the first time, I was excited for a new adventure, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t terrified. The idea of just being in another country without anyone I knew was deeply uncomfortable, but as all things in life, the only way was forward. Even in a country where I originally knew no one, I made close friends from across the globe. Figuring out visas, bank accounts, phone numbers, etc. was hard, but it all worked out – it made me appreciate what immigrants go through even more.
In my time abroad, I got to visit over ten countries. In the past, I never had to book my own flights, figure out where to stay, and create a daily schedule all by and for myself. At first it was scary, but after that initial hump, it turned out to be so much fun. I realized how different cultures and ways of living compared to the US. I loved what each country brought to the table: the food, the traditions, the people, but one big takeaway was how much I took all the privileges from living in the US for granted. The cultural aura that the US exuded on the rest of the world made me feel even more pride for my home.
On the academic side, Oxford math challenged me in many ways. While one of my majors at UVA was math, I never truly felt like a math person before - it was always as if math was only something on the side I was interested in.
In most European universities, students only take classes in their major; for example, math undergrads at Oxford only studied math, whereas in the US, I was taking breadth courses that interested me ranging from lectures on carbon neutrality to the history of hip-hop. While I’m glad to have had the US undergrad experience, in my masters classes, I could definitely feel the imposter syndrome creeping in, especially with the faster pace of lectures.
One big lesson I learned was that I’m more capable than I give myself credit for; once I sat down for a few hours and reasoned through the material, I would feel pretty solid. Everyone has different routines for learning; some friends of mine would spend the entire day in the library, but that wouldn’t work for me – I often needed time for my brain to relax. Trusting my own process and the way I learn best worked out pretty well and I ended up doing great on my exams.
Enjoying Solitude
My friends would often stay home during the breaks, but I wanted to travel, so I dived into the realm of solo-traveling. It was something a few of my friends back home had raved about, and I would always say, “Man, I wish I could do that.” This year that mentality changed.
I saw so many different cities in Europe while staying in hostels, and I realized how much I loved solo-traveling. It felt freeing – I could do whatever I wanted (it was usually bakery hopping and journaling). I think fondly about that time: having no responsibility and just living. I distinctly remember sipping hot chocolate along a river in Ghent, Belgium, thinking, “I know nobody in this country.” It didn’t scare me, it felt like an escape from the woes of every day life.
I love hanging out with friends, but having time to myself made me introspective and appreciative for everything in my life. I hope to incorporate more time to do that, even when I’m not roaming the streets of Europe.
Staying Closer to Home
Everybody talks about how you make amazing friends abroad, and I did, but the ones back home got me through the year. This year, I put an effort to stay close with people who I cared about – it was something I told myself I’d do when studying abroad, and I’m glad I stuck with it (see my project Sealed). I’ve realized the results of compounding investments into relationships; I feel like I’ve gotten closer to friends back home by calling them every two weeks or so, even without being there in person. Had I not put in the effort, I realistically could have lost touch. I’m reminded of one of my favorite quotes from How I Met Your Mother:
You will be shocked, kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways with people forever. That’s why, when you find someone you want to keep around, you do something about it.
I never went home to the US in my year abroad; it might be the longest I’ll ever go without returning home. This was an intentional choice to force me to travel and explore where I was, and while I have no regrets, I think visiting home once might’ve been nice. It was tough at times, but honestly not as bad as I would’ve thought. That’s because I didn’t really feel like my friends from home left. I’m so grateful for them: the ones who visited me and the ones I could call whenever and debrief about life updates.
How to Cook
One of the best parts of being in a European city like Oxford was how walkable it is. The grocery store was a five minute walk from my room, which made cooking really convenient, unlike my undergrad where I would need a car (which I had to rely on my roommates for). Cooking was just like anything in life; the more time I spent on it, the better I got – I was so impressed with how good food could taste. I’d be up late at night watching videos on the Maillard reaction and experimenting the next day like a scientist. I learned so much about the value of getting a good sear and using spices and marinades.
Cooking also made me appreciate even more the food I was consuming. Instead of just eating food and thinking it tasted great, I now think about what individual flavors combine to make me feel this way – for example, what are the different sources of salt and how do the different textures in the dish contribute to the overall experience? I’ll definitely miss being able to cook so often and having ingredients so readily accessible.
Getting in Shape
While studying was important at Oxford, I prioritized going to the gym and eating healthy, which I admittedly was not the best at during my undergrad. The result was night and day; I could confidently say I was in the best shape of my life and hope to add to the momentum I built up. I realized that having a gym a two minute walk away was an incredible motivator for working out. I was able to complete the Murph (without the weight belt… that will change soon) and now want to keep it as a yearly tradition. Consistently going to the gym revealed how hard work compounds over time; previously, I kept switching my routines and questioning if I was heading in the right direction. What I didn’t realize is that the most important thing about your gym routine is sticking to it.
Going abroad meant missing so many events back home and the FOMO was real. But I wouldn’t change any of it for the growth I experienced and the person I became.